Best and Worst of thisiswhyimbroke.com

I found this site several years ago now, and have been watching it off and on ever since. There’s some pretty outrageous stuff, and pretty cool stuff on there… I thought I might share some of my favorites of these two categories.

DISCLAIMER: I don’t own any of this junk, I didn’t take these pictures, I grabbed them off of the “This Is Why I’m Broke” site, and probably didn’t bother linking them back to the original post… I might, I don’t know. It just seems like something I’d forget to do, so just go to http://www.thisiswhyimbroke.com if you’re looking for something, and I didn’t link it back to the site.

SECONDLY: I know for a fact that I’ll be making fun of someone’s typo(s) as part of this post, which of course means I’ll have at least a few typos of my own. This does not give you the right to say “If you’re going to make fun of someone for making typos, you should run spell check”. This is my blog, so shut face. šŸ˜›

The Outrageous
This is the stuff you see, and you think “If I were a zillionaire, I’d still feel like a dolt for buying that.” These are the things that Americans buy that make other nations shake their heads in disgust.

1. Water Jet Pack

Could you imagine walking out to the beach with this thing? First, you’re going to look like a clown dragging it out there. Second, there’s a compressor somewhere below you in the water, so you’re only going to go up so high. You’re going to look like a the human version of the house fly with a string tied to its leg, zipping around in circles. Third, you’re going to spray water down on the poor folks below you, unless of course you wait until the beach is empty. Then again if you’re going spend that $100,000 on it, you probably already own your own beach anyway.

The ONLY way I could understand someone buying this is to rent it out like an amusement ride.

(Not saying I wouldn’t accept one as a gift, in case you’re thinking ahead to my birthday.)

2. Retro Alien Couch
couch

That’s pretty cool, right? A retro alien couch. I’d probably chuckle at it, if I saw it somewhere. Probably start a conversation about it.

I’d also likely lose control of my bladder while laughing when the owner tells me he

blurb

(cause you know a chick wouldn’t be so dumb as to buy that) paid FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS for it! Five grand! Are you kidding?

Oh, and here’s the marketing blurb from their site that appears right next to the pic.

Pay special attention to the big red arrow that I put in there… Shouldn’t that say “An”? “It features AN all fine leather…”

I’m guessing he hasn’t sold any, cause if he had, he’d have been able to pay an editor or proofreader.

3. Shark Shaped Personal Submarine
shark2

I will admit, this might be kinda funny. I just don’t know if I could really get into this thing. I mean, I’m all for underwater exploration, and truth be told, I’ve always secretly wished I had my own submarine.

But this thing is QUITE CLEARLY more about being seen, rather than seeing things.

shark

I can tell you with no doubt in my mind, driving around with that thing behind you, you’re going to get some “Oh please” looks. Okay, we get it, you have money to burn. How about spending it less stupidly. This thing screams decadent-irresponsible-American on board.

shark3

This one just reminds me of that Batman move from way back, when he’s dangling from the helicopter, and he has some “Bat Shark Repellent” spray or something.

errorshark

Oh, and again, something from their site that suggests that either they think joining them on Facebook is an error, or they aren’t selling enough units to pay for proper web development.

Maybe I should call them…

The Pretty Cool Stuff
This is the stuff they have that you look at, and think one of the following things:

  • Hey, that’s kinda neat!
  • PFFF nice! HAR!
  • You know, that’s just silly enough to be funny, and for a price that doesn’t suck.

1. The Raptor Hoodie

Who doesn’t love dinosaurs, right? And I have to admit, the kid’s cute, loves his sweatshirt, and it’s only $25. You’d spend that on a sweatshirt anyway. …alright, maybe not, but if you were going to splurge, you might.

2. Oreo Dunking Spoon

THAT is just freaking cool. It’s THREE Dollars, and you get to completely submerge your cookies without them sogging out of your fingers, or your milk tasting like whatever your fingers were doing before you sat down, or your fingers stinking like sour milk later.

Someone was thinking here.

3. Cassette Tape iPhone Case

I’ve never really made it a secret, but I’m a pretty anti-Apple guy. No real reason other than I’m tired of the folks who swear by them looking down their noses and trying to poke holes in the idea that Windows is better. (IT’S THE INDUSTRY STANDARD FOR A REASON, PEOPLE!!)

But I grew up when the cassette tape was cool, and think this is pretty clever, and it’s $1.93.

4. USB Wall Outlet

That’s just genius! It’s $27.95, a little more expensive than a standard receptacle, but come on! How freaking brilliant is that?!

5. The Flying F*ck

We’ve all said it, heard it, or at least thought it. It’s remote-controlled, it flies and it says F*ck. For $30, I thought about bringing one to my company Christmas party, and giving it away… Thus being able to say, “You see? I DO give a Flying F*ck.”

Have you purchased any of these? Have you ever been to the site? Go there now, and post a link to your favorite item on there in the comments! šŸ™‚

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12 thoughts on “Best and Worst of thisiswhyimbroke.com

  1. I am pretty sure I could sit here for thirty days straight and not come up with that oreo thing (oh…or any of the other cool ideas)

  2. That iPhone cassette case is trying to target hipsters. You know, because it’s “old” and “ironic.” But I’m with you on the Apple vs Windows thing. I just can’t stand a company that thinks they can charge $2,000 for a laptop that’s not even as powerful as my $500 Windows laptop. Give me a break.

    Also, that flying F*ck is hilarious.

    • Yeah, I hear ya man… as an IT guy I feel similarly toward Apple, and occasionally I come up against a graphic designer or something who likes to say “Gosh, I don’t have these problems, cause *I* only use Mac computers.”

      Yeah, you make up 5% of the earth’s work force. You don’t have these problems cause no one cares to target your machine.

      Jerk.

      You know, you oughtta do a comic strip about hipsters, cause truth be told, I don’t even know what a hipster is… Not sure I’d be able to spot one. “How to identify hipsters” or something like that…

  3. Every single one of these things is insanely cool, but I’d die for a personal submarine. Shark shaped or not. Thanks for the heads up Matt!

    Medieval Hand Blades! I would wear them to the Wolverine premiere before I got arrested.

    • You know, I’m freakin worried now. In the off chance that someone drags me to the beach, and I see a shark, I’m going to get eaten, because I’ll be standing there wondering if it’s a submarine too long.

      And were I to wear those hand blades, I’d be the idiot who forgot to take them off when he went to blow his nose or scratch something what doesn’t like blades.

      • When I was a kid I made some out of coat hangers and cut myself up pretty bad. It was worth it though. šŸ™‚

        If they had a shark plane it would be Sharknado!

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